Just like the other kids

This July will mark our third year with WEAP. Noah's intensive three-year program will end. Starting this July until his 21st birthday, Noah will be receiving fewer hours of therapy than he has had up to this point. I have mixed feelings about it. On the one hand I am excited about him being with the family more, and having more freedom to go places. On the other hand, his therapy will go from 35 hours a week down to approximately 10 hours a week. That is a big chunk of educational time that we will lose.

Because Noah will be going full days to school for Fourth grade, the school and I decided that he needed some "transition" time to prepare for a full day. For this month, Noah is going full days on Thursdays. Next month, he will go full days on Thursdays and another day (Tuesdays maybe?). Noah has been going to school since he was three, but never for a full day. During Junior and Senior Kindergarten he got out of school at 11:00 AM - just like the other kids. But in First, Second, and now Third grade, he leaves at 1:00 to come home for ABA therapy. Then from 1:15 until 6:00 PM every night he is working in our home with therapists.

Last week Thursday was Noah's first day of all-day school. I was nervous. All afternoon I wondered if there was more hitting, tantrums, screaming, or (god forbid) vomiting. But Noah came out of school on Thursday happier than I have seen him in a long time. His aide said he had a great day. Noah told me he went to computer lab "with the other kids", and he stayed all day "just like the other kids." I realized at that time that he wants to be like his peers more than I imagined. Up to this point, he often seemed oblivious to his peers interactions and behavior. I could tell he wanted to be like his friends, but I also thought it wasn't Noah's priority.

My heart just bleeds knowing that he never will be exactly "just like the other kids." Knowing now that he wants to be, just makes it worse. Then I remind myself. This is good. This is really good progress. He WANTS to be like the other kids. That is "normal" and developmentally appropriate. I will embrace this new need for "belonging" and help him every step of the way.