LeTTerS and Numb3rs

It is difficult to have consistent discipline, whether your child is "neurotypical" or autistic. Noah spends his days with many different people, with many different personalities. He has Brian and I at home, his therapists from Wisconsin Early Autism Project (there are 5 of them), two aides at school, a regular education teacher, a special education teacher, a speech/language pathologist, and an occupational therapist, just to name a few. We are a group of people whose only real common link is Noah. We all demonstrate different strengths and weaknesses, as do most people in society.

Brian is a numbers guy. Always has been; always will be. Whereas, I am more of a language oriented person. Most of the time, we compliment each other very well. We approach each child-centered task in our household as a cohesive team. Brian and I work well together. But we also have different styles for discipline. Brian, the numbers guy, likes to "count" when the children misbehave. He is a huge fan of 1-2-3 Magic. I, on the other hand, like to analyze the problem and try to figure out what the child "needs". Once a psych major, always a psych major!

Obviously, some confusion has arose from our different styles. I also think school is handling some behaviors differently than our home therapists, which is also adding to the confusion.

Noah thrives on consistency. If every single day could be exactly the same as the last, he would be happy. Unfortunately, life is not like that. There are always last minute changes, different places to go, new people to meet, and new foods to try. Along those lines, there will always be different people to work with who have varying personalities.

Flexibility is a very difficult concept for Noah, but he is showing improvement in that area. It is also a difficult concept for Brian, who demonstrates many traits of aspergers. The 1-2-3 Magic program is simple, and has a definite curriculum with right and wrong clearly defined. My way does not. I am thinking that if we ALL use 1-2-3 Magic generalized across all settings, with all the people in his life involved and cooperating together, we may see some improvement with behavior. I have called a meeting with school, and one with therapists. I am taking charge in hopes of improving Noah's quality of life, and I am hopeful that this will work.

No Cavities

Noah has been experiencing an increased state of agitation since Christmas. He seems more angry, and disconnected. He bangs on tables, walls, and floors with his hands or his head. I have been trying to understand what may be wrong.

We know that Noah has gained weight, has grown a couple inches, and is older. I called the doctor, and he increased Noah's Risperdal (psychosomatic med). The next week I called again to inform the doctor that there was no change in Noah's behavior. The medication was increased one more time. I now sit here wondering, do I call again today? It has been another week, and again there is no change in behavior. The doctor will increase the medication, and I'm starting to wonder.....is it the right medication? Is this the right thing to do?

Last week Brian had noticed a black spot behind one of Noah's front bottom teeth. Ah Ha!! I called the pediatric dentist, all "hopeful" that a painful cavity could be to blame for this behavior. In the past, Noah has demonstrated some pretty big tantrums due to loose teeth, or other pain. The dentist got us in right away the day I called. The black spot, however, was identified as tarter build-up, and there were no cavities. My husband and I are the only parents on the planet "disappointed" that our child does not have a cavity. If it were a cavity, then we would have an explanation, an understanding of what may be causing the behavior. Back to the drawing board....

Then, Noah came home from school two days ago with a sore on his foot. When asked, he said his shoes hurt. I bought a pair of shoes an entire size bigger. He LOVES his new shoes. He had a better day at school today too. This may explain the difficult days at school, but at home and during therapy he does not wear shoes. I am still puzzled, and will continue to monitor everything. Research, research! Times like these are when I wish he could verbalize his needs more readily.